This week’s Five Minute Friday prompt is on the word new. Join me below as you see what five minutes of unedited writing looks like. Sometimes I feel like it makes sense only to me. That’s ok, right?

I’ll admit, I stole an extra minute because I needed a moment to collect my thoughts right there in the middle. Sometimes that happens. My thoughts derail as I reflect on where I’ve been and I tell myself that, even though I don’t know where I’m going, a faithful God has been leading me down this road the entire time and I have no reason not to trust.

It’s a new way of thinking, for someone always cautious…careful. I overcalculate and plan ahead. I play things safe.

That hasn’t changed, really. I’m still all of those things. But less concerned about how it’s all going to end. Trust is BIG and I keep grabbing ahold like it’s going to run away from me.

But the Voice I listen to speaks more often now and I’m starting to understand how to tune my ear to the sound. I won’t lie, some times I turn on my heels and head in the other direction.

And then I have to ask “why?” I already know that my Ninevah will still be there waiting for me to fulfill what I’ve been asked to do. He has set that path in front of me and makes it known in His own timing. 

And I work hard to obey through the fear.

This new strength is different for me. Some days it’s stronger than others, but, wow – it just continues to blow my mind how quickly He can work.

Even on me…

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New

Start:

“Well this is new,” she said as she touched the rolled paper bracelet around my wrist. “How fun is that?”

She didn’t know what it was. The truth is, I wouldn’t have known either just a few years ago. It was just another beaded bracelet made by some crafty woman overseas. It was pretty, but it held minimal interest in my busy, first world life.

In fact, the only “fair trade” items I would’ve cared about were in the form of a leaf that I’d steep in my tea cup several times a day.

And then this year happened. And things changed. I became new.  So new that I just can’t even fathom the difference one year makes.

I look toward the past and wonder if I could even find my way back if I tried.

I don’t want to. Sometimes I miss being oblivious. Selfish. Keenly unaware.

But what was important then doesn’t hold a candle to my changed heart.  My new heart.

When He got ahold of me years ago the convictions surfaced slowly. One at a time…until I could see a different reflection staring back. Then something happened. New happened – and it happened fast.

I asked Him to remove me from what was petty. The hold the world had on me. The relationships that just couldn’t seem to get past surface level.

I wanted Him to change my heart. I was all in.

And now I sit and wonder what new looks like tomorrow, just like I did yesterday. I never know. And that’s the beauty of trust.

Our vessels continue to be molded under His hands…always into something new. 

And I’m ok with that now.

Stop.

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Won’t you join me this week for Five Minute Friday over at Kate Motaung’s page?  We’d love to see you there!  Just familiarize yourself with this page first, no editing, and set your watch for five minutes.